


The Sans Situation

by ReadWithDetermination



Series: When Two Tsunderes Go on A Date, Does the Void Implode? [3]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Comedy, F/F, F/M, Fellswap - Freeform, Funny, Genderless Original Character, Humor, M/M, Mild Language, Original Character is Reader from another story, Papyrus is a good bro, Post-Undertale Pacifist Route, Reader is Tired of Their Friends' BS, Reader is a good friend, References to Addiction, References to Drugs, References to Rehab, Rubber Ducks, Spoilers - Undertale Pacifist Route, Tsundere Original Character(s), Tsundere Sans (Undertale), Tsunderes, Undertale Monsters on the Surface, genderless reader, reader is a nurse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-02
Updated: 2019-12-02
Packaged: 2021-02-17 23:27:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21651490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReadWithDetermination/pseuds/ReadWithDetermination
Summary: Precursor to "Matchmaker Papyrus and his Two Tsunderes" and "To My Date, With Hate, Love Sans".Reader is the nurse roommate from those stories.(FellSwap/Swapfell Red Sans & Papyrus Surface AU)You introduced your roommate to the Skeleton Brothers in hopes you would be a good friend to Papyrus.  However, their constantly butting heads with Sans was starting to concern you.  If you had known what was about to go down that afternoon, you wouldn't have been worried at all.
Relationships: Alphys/Undyne (Undertale) - mentioned, Papyrus (Undertale) & Reader, Sans (Undertale)/OC - discussed
Series: When Two Tsunderes Go on A Date, Does the Void Implode? [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1558828
Comments: 10
Kudos: 48





	The Sans Situation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [melovecats](https://archiveofourown.org/users/melovecats/gifts).



> This one is for melovecats, the second person to asked me for more of this...I guess it's now a series. XD
> 
> I've gone with Chara as the human child as I've seen them replace Frisk most often in the Swapfell/Fellswap AUs. I also wanted most of the main monsters to have their new start on life because I like happy endings (and because Muffet hardly ever gets enough love, so by thunder, the Underground's version of a most persistent Girl Scout was getting her cameo!). Let me know if you liked the direction I was going with that, and I might do some drabbles with the versions I was using.
> 
> If you liked the fic, be sure to leave me a comment! Comments are my bread and butter, y'all. The more comments, the more I write!   
> (I also take suggestions for stories and podfics)

As you watched Papyrus slowly work his way to recovery, you knew he would need some positive support to help him stay on the right track.

Perhaps it was in an ethical gray area to get so invested in your patients' lives outside of the clinic, but the tall, lanky skeleton had grown on you. You wanted him to succeed and you knew he didn't really have a great deal of support. In fact, you could count the number of people in his support network on one hand:

There was his older brother, Sans. Sans was very protective of Papyrus, but due to their environment had to put up the front of a bully just so Papyrus would be less likely to be targeted Undergound. He dearly regretted what many of his words and actions had done to his younger brother's psyche and had been doing his best to help him recover now that they were on the Surface, but he was still very rough around the edges.

Then there was Asgore, the former king of the Underground. It surprised you that the laidback skeleton would have befriended anyone who had been tied to the normally cutthroat world of politics, but he had apparently met Asgore long after the goat monster had fled from his estranged wife. Truthfully, they didn't officially meet until right before the Barrier was broken, though Papyrus claimed they had told puns and stories to one another through some huge door? It was a long story, but the gist of it was that Papyrus' jokes were able to calm the traumatized monster on the other side of the door, and the two had struck up a tentative friendship. You'd met Asgore when he came to one of the group sessions, and knew him to be an absolute sweetheart. His therapy seemed to be helping him, as he shook a lot less and the feral look to his eyes had tapered off due to a combination of magical infusions, medication, and a whole lot of sharing with his psychiatrist.

To some extent, there was also the couple Alphys and Undyne. A warrior and scientist respectively, they were more of Sans' friends than Papyrus'. Undyne had the same addiction as Papyrus (minus the cigarettes), and showed herself to be as much the victim of circumstances as he was. Alphys had recovered well and adjusted to Surface life with relative ease, save for her tendency to still want to solve problems through violence. She had a lot of energy and enthusiasm, and though she could be gruff at times, she was able to get Papyrus and Undyne moving at times when they needed to be.

Muffet was probably the most well-adjusted of any of Papyrus' friends, having run a successful restaurant both below ground and above. She'd been a bit more protected than most of the other monsters, what with being backed by millions of non-monster spiders and her enormous guard-pet, Cupcake. She was tough yet firm and had discreetly played mother to many of her younger patrons Underground — including the Skeleton Brothers. However, her new cafe had taken off, so the extra branches she had just opened kept her too busy to be there for Papyrus as much as he needed.

Finally, there was Chara. According to Papyrus, having seen how Chara's parents' crack habit had led them to runaway from home, he decided to get his act cleaned up. In fact, Papyrus had checked himself into the same program they had entered because he heard how much it had helped them. You knew it was also to keep an eye on them. Papyrus might not have showed it often, but he was fiercely protective of the kid - so much so that you wondered if his sole purpose had been to just see if they were keeping their word, with his own progress having just been a perk. But Chara was a child, and despite being mature for their age, was not in the position to be a proper confidant to someone recovering from addiction.

In fact, hardly anyone in Papyrus' support group was mentally stable or emotionally mature enough to be the sort of influence to keep him from relapsing.

That was where your roommate came in.

They'd already been a staple at your clinic, not as patient but as support for another friend that had successfully completed the program. They were pragmatic but hopeful, confident, and had a good grasp on their own mental and physical wellbeing. They also knew how to work with people recovering from addiction and, if not for having a job they already loved, would have made you a good coworker.

They definitely had the sort of energy scarred monsters from the Underground needed to be around. And, indeed, they proved to be absolutely invaluable to Papyrus, both as support and as a translator for many of the idiosyncrasies he encountered with human society.

But you couldn't for the life of you figure out why your roommate and Sans, both people who were very supportive of Papyrus when alone, butted heads the moment the other stepped into the room!

It wasn't that neither of them were trying not to get along. It just seemed like somewhere along the way, one of them would start antagonizing the other until either your roommate was spluttering in rage or some sort of contest had been set between the two of them. Your roommate was so good at calling out other people's garbage and not letting their emotions get the better of them, so why did they take the bait with Sans?

It wasn't every once in a while, either. Literally every single time, without fail, they would either be accepting or making a challenge, turn into a sputtering mess, or walk off in a huff away from Sans. In fact, it seemed the two of you were less at odds when you were working as rivals, which was absolutely silly!

For heaven's sake, they had bought a rubber duck, drawn red eyes on it, and told you they liked to pretend to drown it whenever they took a bath! It was getting to horror movie levels of disturbing!

It finally got to the point that you had to talk to Papyrus about it.

After receiving one of those "we need to talk" texts from your roommate after they had another run-in with Sans out town, you called Papyrus and asked him to come over. 

You had spaced out staring at your cup of tea as you puzzled over the situation. You noticed Papyrus was talking and instinctively kept making affirmative nods and noises to show you heard him, but it actually took a moment for it to sink in that he was talking to you.

"See the future in those tea leaves?" he asked.

"Hmm," came your noncommittal response.

"Pretty sure it's gone cold now."

"Hmm..."

"I'm moving to Alaska to start a new life. I heard it's _snow_ peaceful up there."

"Hmm..."

"Your hair's on fire."

"Hmm..."

"Sans has a crush on your roommate."

"Hmm—-HUH?!"

Your brain must have had a filter on in regards to certain words, because the moment the words "Sans" and "roommate" were detected, alarm bells started going off. You snapped your head up so fast you nearly gave yourself whiplash, only to see Papyrus calmly taking a sip from his bottle of barbecue sauce.

"What did you say?" you asked.

"Had to say something to get your attention. You've been staring at your tea for the past ten minutes," he said, "what's on your mind?"

You sighed and apologized, and then proceeded to tell him what was going on. You hadn't wanted to worry him, but you were concerned the rivalry between Sans and your roommate might turn toxic and that the aggression might be detrimental to Papyrus' progress. Surprisingly, Papyrus seemed absolutely unconcerned with any of it.

"—I swear, it's as if they've come up with their own version of sign language, and the gesture for Sans is this!" You made grasping motions with your hands, twisting as if you were trying to break an unseen neck. 

Papyrus chuckled. "They are quite spirited, aren't they?"

"Papyrus," you chided, "this is serious! I'm very concerned they might hurt one another. As much as I love my friend, I don't want them to accidentally hurt your brother, or to find out that your brother may have hurt them, even if it was just because of a prank." You pulled his free bony hand into yours and patted the back of it, looking him in the eye. "I introduced them to you. If something happened, I'd feel horrible because I was partly responsible. You're my friend, Papyrus, and so is Sans. I don't want to see anything happen to either of you guys, especially after all of the progress you've made."

Papyrus looked thoughtfully at you for a moment before standing up and motioning for you to do the same. He ambled over and bent his lanky frame down, wrapping his hoodie-covered arms around you for a brief moment.

"Hey, it's alright," he said pulling away, "nothing's going to happen to either of us."

"But how can you be so sure?"

Papyrus was quiet for a long moment, then let out a strained noise as he scratched the back of his head. He looked around the room for a moment, as if mulling something over, before letting out a huff.

"Well, you didn't hear this from me," he said, giving you a conspiratorial look. You nodded. If he knew some reason behind all of the antagonization, then you'd do anything just to know things were going to be alright! Finally, he grinned and turned back to you, "I'm not sure about them, but I know Sans has just been showing out."

"Okay, why?"

Papyrus chuckled and drained the last of his barbecue sauce in one last chug, as if the sludgy brown liquid was providing him with liquid courage. The raised brow bones and crooked grin on his face hinted whatever it was was probably something pretty wild.

"My brother made a rather interesting announcement the other day at supper," he told you. "It seems like he's determined not to defeat your roommate, but to _date_ them."

You blinked.

Then you blinked some more.

"What?"

"I didn't say my brother had a crush on your roommate for no reason."

You couldn't believe what you were hearing.

Sans. The little skeleton, who seemed happiest when he was trying to level Alphys' forested backyard and aggravating your roommate until they were only able to speak gibberish, was infatuated with the very person he kept driving up the wall?!

"I thought you told me that to get my attention after I spaced out!" You downed half your tea — chamomile, meant to calm your nerves - in one gulp, staring at Papyrus with wild eyes. "C'mon, Papyrus, buddy, I NEED details!"

And so, Papyrus enlightened you.

Sans had apparently been carrying a torch for your friend for goodness knew how long. After Papyrus described how his brother had, in his way, tried to impress you while simultaneously trying not to let on that he was crushing so hard. You could understand why Sans would want to guard his heart, especially after you learned about how life had been Underground. Looking back, so many of his behaviors now made sense. However, the way he had gone about it wasn't baiting your roommate for romance and getting them to interact with him in a roundabout way. No, it seemed all Sans had done was tick them off. 

Speaking of your roommate, they were going to be home soon. Right, they wanted to have a talk with you, didn't they? Well, maybe if they just knew-

"No."

"What do you mean 'no', Paps?"

"Sans would lose his mind if he found out I told on him," Papyrus said, gesturing with his empty bottle. "Besides, it's...nice, his being able to have something to look forward to like this."

You were puzzled by what Papyrus meant.

"Sans needs an outlet to still feel as powerful as he was Underground," Papyrus told you. "He's very self-disciplined, but going from constant danger to the sort of mundane life we have up here now? The sudden shift liked to have drove him nuts. He needs something with a healthy sort of risk."

"Can't he just go to an amusement park of take up hanggliding?"

Papyrus chuckled, then shook his head. "It's not about just having a cheap thrill," he continued. "My brother really admires and respects our little friend. He's usually direct in what he wants, so to have him hold back like this? I think he's afraid he's going to run 'em off."

Ah. That made sense. Nobody ever wants to be rejected by someone they like, and while he did drive your roommate bonkers every now and then, they had admitted they enjoyed many of the challenges Sans threw at them. The fire in their eyes when they squared off against the smaller skeleton was palpable, and you could practically feel the energy roll off them. You didn't really want to make their unorthodox friendship awkward by bringing up Sans' crush, especially since your friend obviously didn't feel that way.

You just wanted them to calm down so they didn't actually try to drown Sans like they claimed they acted out on that poor rubber duck!

Suddenly, you heard a vehicle door slam. 'They must be home,' you realized. After promising Papyrus you would't tell on his brother, you stepped out into the hallway as Papyrus grabbed a second bottle of BBQ sauce and began tearing the plastic off the top.

With a fury, they unlocked the door and threw it open, their nostrils flaring as you quickly made eye contact with them. Their eyes were wide and their face was flushed red, and they were looking every bit like they were about to meet the executioner's axe. You could only hope they weren't about to wield said axe against any unsuspecting skellies.

They called your name, almost breathless, and ran up to you. Taking you by the shoulders, they looked you square in the eyes and said, "I have a HUGE problem!" 

"I realized that from the text," you told them before heaving a sigh. "What did Sans do this time?"

An image of the shorter skeleton cackling wickedly before turning a smug smirk on your friend as they had many times before crossed your mind. You wondered what sort of challenge he had baited them into this round, or what message was behind his latest insult. 

Instead, you got none of those, but you did notice your roommate's face heating up as they started to shake. Their mouth twisted into a strange expression as they let out a high-pitched noise not unakin to a whistling tea kettle. Taking in their expression again, you saw they looked not angry, but panicked.

"It's," they started, their voice trailing from almost falsetto pitch down down into a despairing whine, then speeding up before ending in a crescendo of melodramatic shouting, "not something he did. Or maybe it was? A lot of somethings, all combined together at once and OMG I'M SO DEEEEEEAD!!!"

They threw their head back, letting out a keening wail as they slumped down to the floor. You tried to catch them, shooting Papyrus a worried look. This wasn't normal behavior for your friend. In fact, you only saw them act this way if their favorite sports team lost a game or their favorite anime character died.

"What on earth is the matter with you? C'mon, get up! If Sans did or didn't do anything, then I don't understand why you—"

Your friend murmured something you didn't understand from the hands they had clamped over their face.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"M'rve ah kurshns."

"'We're out of cushions?'" They just shook their head. "Are you high?"

"Nurr! Mmm've a kruzh uhn shuns..." they said a little louder, only to let their mumbling fade off quietly at the end.

You groaned loudly, grabbing their hands and trying to pull them away from your friend's face. You saw Papyrus raise a brow bone at them before raising his new bottle to take a swig.

"I can't hear what you're saying! Now, what—"

Immediately, your friend let their arms fall to the floor, leaving themselves in a heap kneeling on the floor in a pose that was usually reserved for a movie hero whose best friend had taken a fatal hit from the villain. Instead of a prolonged "NO!" screamed at levels reserved for theaters, however, you heard something equally as loud but far less expected:

"I HAVE THE BIGGEST FREAKING CRUSH ON SANS!!! THERE! ARE YOU HAPPY?!"

You heard the bottle of barbecue sauce hit the floor a split second later. You looked up from your roommate's now obvious embarrassment to the tall skeleton standing nearby. You hadn't seen Papyrus' eyes bug out that badly since Chara roller skated down a hill and nearly went into oncoming traffic.

You heard a series of stunted grunts and realized that your friend had noticed that they had an audience.

For a solid minute, nobody made a sound.

Then...

"P-p-papyrus?" they squeak-shouted, reminding you of a crab from a certain fairy tale film. "What are you doing here?!" 

Papyrus slapped a hand over his eyes and fell back against the door frame, laughing so hard he could barely stand. You roommate went from panicking and asking why he was laughing to demanding that he stop (still in a high-pitched voice) before finally despairing and burying their face in their hands again.

That was was when you realized:

Everything Sans did.

Everything your roommate did.

It all made perfect sense.

All for the 

SAME. 

DAMN. 

REASON!

You joined Papyrus in his hysterics. Your friend yelled, "You both suck," and you were only partially disappointed that Papyrus beat you in making a joke that made what part of their face you could see even redder than it already was. 

You were preparing to call them out on their behavior for worrying you when a thought suddenly hit you.

"Wait a minute...you didn't get that duck to pretend to drown it, did you?"

Your roommate looked up at you in horror.

Papyrus, who had fallen to the floor and only narrowly missed the spilled barbecue sauce with his lanky legs, asked, "What duck?"

You shared a brief look with your roommate as you felt your grin widen to the point it nearly hurt your face. Treasuring the look of betrayal on their face as they shook their head, mouthing "no", you darted off toward the bathroom to sell them out, heart and soul.

After all, that's what best friends do.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, since we've had Coachlike!Reader and Papyrus' POVs, why not the roommate's? I'll be sure to do one from Sans' perspective, too.
> 
> This one was slightly more dialogue heavy than the other two, so hopefully it didn't take away from suspension of disbelief. I know most 2nd-Person POVs try to shy away from that to let your imagination come up with the exact way you would respond in a situation. I think I'm doing a fairly good job at not using (y/n) but weaving who I'm talking about into the story in a way you can still understand who I'm talking about.
> 
> What do you all think? I'd appreciate the feedback and what else you'd like to see.


End file.
